So God brought me through one semester of Bible college...
and He has led me to another one.
This morning, I read in Matthew 6...
"And why take ye thought for raiment? Consider the lilies of the field,
how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin: And yet I say unto you,
That even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these."
I wondered what it could have meant that Solomon,
a man so rich & powerful, wasn't to be compared to a lily!?
Throughout the day of pondering, the Lord finally opened my eyes.
Solomon had it all.
He never had to worry about food, finances, and friends...
He never needed to rely on God to provide everything for Him.
His life was comfortable, secure, and enjoyable.
A small lily of the field is so helpless, unable to do anything.
It's only source of life and existence is from God.
It relies totally on Him for the sunshine, rain, and growth.
...How does this relate to me, as a Christian?...
I have to say, it's pretty scary, since I had no money to put on my first payment,
my job only covers 1/2 my bill, and my classes have a lot of intense projects.
But looking back, when I was so worried about His provision,
I see how He actually got me through.
So many times I doubted Him, wondered if He even heard my prayers or cared,
and even considered giving up and choosing an easier path of a secular career.
But after tears, prayers, and continually handing it over to the Lord
(I say "continually", since I was always taking it back into my own hands),
He finally showed Himself and provided the exact amount of money I needed.
It was such a mircale, and it taught me so many lessons of faith.
Even now, looking back and seeing His provision, I'm ashamed
to say that I still have a hard time trusting Him to provide for me.
I've always been the type of person to plan out everything,
be sure to see my future clearly ahead of me,
and make desicions based on logical analyzing.
The Christian walk isn't all logic-following.
(Our brains aren't to be compared to God's way of thinking, anyway!)
If I can see the steps right in front of me, where does faith come in?
God brings us to places where we are helpless, cannot see the next step,
and are empty-handed. Why? Why does He do this to His children?
Because it's when we finally let go of providing and planning for oursleves,
that we become as dependent children of a loving Father.
We have an opportunity to grow closer to Him,
and to watch how He will provide.
Isn't that amazing? That God cares to provide for me?
If I always did things for myself, I would miss out on seeing God's miracles.
He used that time last semester, and even now as I'm still scared,
to teach me to let go of my pride, and fully lean on Him.
He wants to use this time to nurture my relationship with Him!
God doesn't tell us to do something, then make it impossible to do!
He wants to do that 'impossible' through us.
Not ME through Him, but rahter HIM through me.
Then I realized... what an amazing privilage!
Why in the WORLD does God want to use someone as sinful as me?!
Yet, He does. And He WILL make a way!
I encourage you, Christian friend, DONT give up on God!
Don't be afraid to take that step of faith!
Yes, it's scary, confusing, and even hard.
Satan is going to throw things at you to discourage you.
But just remember in this upcoming year:
When God is calling you to do something, He WILL provide!
"Wherefore, if God so clothe the grass of the field, which to day is, and to morrow is cast into the oven, shall he not much more clothe you, O ye of little faith? Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed? (For after all these things do the Gentiles seek:) for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things. But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you."
Matthew 6:30-33
Monday, January 31, 2011
Friday, January 21, 2011
Completely
This song is one of my favorites!
I was listening to it last night and the words were just such a blessing to me!
The secret of life is letting go
The secret of love is letting it show
In all that I do, In all that I say
Right here in this moment
The power of prayer is in a humble cry
The power of change is in giving my life
And laying it down, Down at Your feet
Right here in this moment
Take my heart, Take my soul
I surrender everything to Your control
And let all that is within me
Lift up to You and say,
"I am Yours, and Yours alone completly"
This journey of life is a search for truth
This journey of faith is following You
Every step of the way, Through the joy & the pain
Right here in this moment
Take my heart, Take my soul
I surrender everything to Your control
And let all that is within me
Lift up to You and say,
"I am Yours, and Yours alone completly"
Right here, right now
And for the rest of my life
Monday, January 17, 2011
He Didn't Throw The Clay Away
Empty and broken, I came back to Him.
A vessel unworthy; so scarred with sin.
But He did not despair-
He started over again,
And I bless the day He didn't throw the clay away.
(Chorus)
Over and over He molds me and makes me.
Into His likeness, He fashions the clay.
A vessel of honor I am today-
All because Jesus didn't throw the clay away.
He is the Potter and I'm just the clay,
But molded in His image, He wants me to stay.
When I stumble and I fall, my vessel breaks-
He just picks up the pieces,
He doesn't throw the clay away.
Over and over He molds me and makes me.
Into His likeness, He fashions the clay.
A vessel of honor I am today-
All because Jesus didn't throw the clay away.
So many times I fail and so many times He picks me up again. He never gives up on us.
Sometimes it seems all our strength is gone and all hope of holiness is vanished:
But Jesus is standing there, ready to give us the victory if we ask Him!
Oh, the Lord is SO good! He is so merciful, loving, longsuffering...
I just can't comprehend why He is so good to me!
"Wherefore I desire that ye faint not at my tribulations for you, which is your glory. For this cause I bow my knees unto the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, Of whom the whole family in heaven and earth is named, That he would grant you, according to the riches of his glory, to be strengthened with might by his Spirit in the inner man; That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded in love, May be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height; And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fulness of God." Ephesians 3:13-19
Friday, January 14, 2011
Winter Break On Campus!
Due to several things, it happened so that I stayed on campus over most of the winter break. (about a 5 week break!) I learned soon that this was the time that so many fun memories would be made! I've met people I never knew were on campus, and became better friends with those I already knew. The chef, I believe, has been spoiling us with exceptionally good meals! (t-bone steak, homemade pizza, etc...!)
There were some interesting times, tiring times, and just plain wacky times!
(We have many insane videos with proof! lol)
There were some interesting times, tiring times, and just plain wacky times!
(We have many insane videos with proof! lol)
So many things happened, can you believe this... I haven't been taking many picture!
LOL. So I'll just share a few pics and narrate:
LOL. So I'll just share a few pics and narrate:
One great memory was that Bro.Ferrso asked me one day to be in charge of a group of callers for him! I was honored to be asked and had a wonderful time!
Here I am in my cubicle!...
My friend Stefany and I were definatly having a fun time!...
Upon not knowing if I was able to go home for Christmas (which, I was able to!!), I was sad of the possibility of missing out on all the great holiday decorations, so I went to the store and bought my own little Christmas tree and decorated it for my room and named him "Happy Joy" *Ü*...
Another fun time was when I was in the GA on my laptop, a family playing Uno Attack asked me to join in! It was such a fun time as two more of my friends came along and we got to know this great family!
After going through a whole semester of longing to play basketball, one evening, we finally had our chance to get out on the court!!
One morning, upon talking to my Gramma in the gazebo, my friend came along and we decided to go... on the playground! (Ü)... it was a fun time of swinging, chatting, and feeling like kids again! Getting up on the fun little bridges are one of my favorite parts!...
Finally, yet, I'd say, the best memory yet, was the day it snowed!! Yes! It SNOWED in desert California! As I was relaxing in my dorm one afternoon, girls started running up the stairs screaming, "IT'S SNOWING!!" I looked outside, and sure enough, little light and fluffy flurries were starting to sprinkle down upon us! We ran outside so excited!...
So after supper, we had the biggest snowball fight you'd ever see! After the fight, some of us went to the gazebo for a time of relaxing and hot cocoa! It was so much fun and a great blessing from the Lord!
It was definatly an awesome winter break! Very relaxing, yet crazy!
God has also been speaking to me alot during break. He's been teaching me many lessons, some of them very painful, but worth the better relationship with Him.
He has been good and has proven Himself over and over again.
He has been so good to keep me going even when I felt like giving up.
Just remember...
He has been good and has proven Himself over and over again.
He has been so good to keep me going even when I felt like giving up.
Just remember...
"Don't doubt in the night
What God gave you in the light"
---Dr.Chappell
Thursday, January 6, 2011
That Ye May Know...
Time to time, I've struggled with assurance.
I've been sometimes worried that I doubted my salvation,
because I thought if I really was saved, I would know it!
I thought that I was the only one, but over the past few months,
I've realized how other dear Christian friends
I have struggle with the same thing!
I've been praying about it for quite some time,
and thought I'd share what the Lord has revealed to me,
in case any anyone else has struggled as well.
I remember when I was 5 years old,
I understood I was a sinner, that Christ died for me,
and I didn't want to go to hell.
I knelt by my bed and prayed and asked Jesus to
forgive me and come into my heart and save me.
When I was about 9, I felt I may not have
really been saved and that I was basing my assurance
on a 'profession' I had made.
So I told the Lord I was sorry for my sins
and that I wanted Him to forgive me,
come into my heart and save me.
Age 12 I struggled.
Age 14 I stuggled.
I have to say, though, that I've struggled the most in 2008.
In March I said a prayer to 'make sure'.
In June I said another one to 'make sure'.
But after a while, I'd start doubting again.
Sometimes I just didn't feel saved.
Finally, on October 16 2008, I told the Lord about it.
Somehow, I figured He didn't know or care I felt no assurance.
I knelt beside my bed and cried out to Him.
I told Him I was doubting and that I was tired of it!
I was so scared...
did I repent enough? did I say the right thing?
did I have enough faith? did I base it all on a prayer?
But then He stopped me and reminded me...
It's not if what I did was good enough,
It's about what Christ did.
He reminded me that His blood was enough.
Romans 10:13 came to me...
"For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved."
All I need is enough faith to just ask Him
and to know I'm a sinner and am sorry.
He reminded me of the time I did that.
When I really called to Him.
I was saved... am saved!
My assurance comes from trusting Him to keep His promise!
I thought I'd share some verses He used to speak to me...
"All that the Father giveth me shall come to me;
and him that cometh to me I will in no wise cast out."
John 6:37
"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son,
that whosoever believeth in him should not perish,
but have everlasting life."
John 3:16
"If a son shall ask bread of any of you that is a father, will he give him a stone? or if [he ask] a fish,
will he for a fish give him a serpent? Or if he shall ask an egg, will he offer him a scorpion?
If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children:how much more shall your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to them that ask him?"
Luke 11:11-13
I knew I was saved... I just needed to trust Him
that He really did hear me and save me and keeps His promises.
It's not God's will for us to be doubting our salvation.
The devil tries to get us to doubt.
Since he cannot have our souls,
he wants to keep us from doing as much for God as he can.
If we spend so much time wondering if we're saved,
we become discouraged and not as useful for Him...
we can forget about all those souls we need to tell, too.
That is our job as a Christian,
and satan tries to keep us too busy with ourselves.
Also, doubting is a sure sign of backsliding.
And when I heard that in a message,
I looked back and realized it was so in my life.
Anytime I wasn't in God's Word,
or did something I knew the Holy Spirit 'pricked' me about,
I would sure enough start doubting.
And after a while, the Holy Spirit will stop 'pricking'.
God will always be there to come back to,
but if we're going to ignore Him, He'll sit back.
Then I really started doubting, since I felt so numb
to the things of the Lord.
But when we're completely right with God,
completely trusting in Him and His Word,
we're not going to doubt!
Praise the Lord that He never gives up.
His mercy and grace never end!
We fall aside so many times,
and when we come back, He's always forgives us!
This wonderful God sent His son to die for our sins.
All we have to do is believe and accept His gift.
If you have done that but are doubting,
I encourage you to tell the Lord about it.
He knows and cares that you are, and He will help you.
"These things have I written unto you that
believe on the name of the Son of God;
that ye may know that ye have eternal life,
and that ye may believe on the name of the Son of God."
1 John 5:13
I've been sometimes worried that I doubted my salvation,
because I thought if I really was saved, I would know it!
I thought that I was the only one, but over the past few months,
I've realized how other dear Christian friends
I have struggle with the same thing!
I've been praying about it for quite some time,
and thought I'd share what the Lord has revealed to me,
in case any anyone else has struggled as well.
I remember when I was 5 years old,
I understood I was a sinner, that Christ died for me,
and I didn't want to go to hell.
I knelt by my bed and prayed and asked Jesus to
forgive me and come into my heart and save me.
When I was about 9, I felt I may not have
really been saved and that I was basing my assurance
on a 'profession' I had made.
So I told the Lord I was sorry for my sins
and that I wanted Him to forgive me,
come into my heart and save me.
Age 12 I struggled.
Age 14 I stuggled.
I have to say, though, that I've struggled the most in 2008.
In March I said a prayer to 'make sure'.
In June I said another one to 'make sure'.
But after a while, I'd start doubting again.
Sometimes I just didn't feel saved.
Finally, on October 16 2008, I told the Lord about it.
Somehow, I figured He didn't know or care I felt no assurance.
I knelt beside my bed and cried out to Him.
I told Him I was doubting and that I was tired of it!
I was so scared...
did I repent enough? did I say the right thing?
did I have enough faith? did I base it all on a prayer?
But then He stopped me and reminded me...
It's not if what I did was good enough,
It's about what Christ did.
He reminded me that His blood was enough.
Romans 10:13 came to me...
"For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved."
All I need is enough faith to just ask Him
and to know I'm a sinner and am sorry.
He reminded me of the time I did that.
When I really called to Him.
I was saved... am saved!
My assurance comes from trusting Him to keep His promise!
I thought I'd share some verses He used to speak to me...
"All that the Father giveth me shall come to me;
and him that cometh to me I will in no wise cast out."
John 6:37
"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son,
that whosoever believeth in him should not perish,
but have everlasting life."
John 3:16
"If a son shall ask bread of any of you that is a father, will he give him a stone? or if [he ask] a fish,
will he for a fish give him a serpent? Or if he shall ask an egg, will he offer him a scorpion?
If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children:how much more shall your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to them that ask him?"
Luke 11:11-13
I knew I was saved... I just needed to trust Him
that He really did hear me and save me and keeps His promises.
It's not God's will for us to be doubting our salvation.
The devil tries to get us to doubt.
Since he cannot have our souls,
he wants to keep us from doing as much for God as he can.
If we spend so much time wondering if we're saved,
we become discouraged and not as useful for Him...
we can forget about all those souls we need to tell, too.
That is our job as a Christian,
and satan tries to keep us too busy with ourselves.
Also, doubting is a sure sign of backsliding.
And when I heard that in a message,
I looked back and realized it was so in my life.
Anytime I wasn't in God's Word,
or did something I knew the Holy Spirit 'pricked' me about,
I would sure enough start doubting.
And after a while, the Holy Spirit will stop 'pricking'.
God will always be there to come back to,
but if we're going to ignore Him, He'll sit back.
Then I really started doubting, since I felt so numb
to the things of the Lord.
But when we're completely right with God,
completely trusting in Him and His Word,
we're not going to doubt!
Praise the Lord that He never gives up.
His mercy and grace never end!
We fall aside so many times,
and when we come back, He's always forgives us!
This wonderful God sent His son to die for our sins.
All we have to do is believe and accept His gift.
If you have done that but are doubting,
I encourage you to tell the Lord about it.
He knows and cares that you are, and He will help you.
"These things have I written unto you that
believe on the name of the Son of God;
that ye may know that ye have eternal life,
and that ye may believe on the name of the Son of God."
1 John 5:13
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Valencia Trip... Mall & Iceskating!!
During the last few weeks of the semester, we had a college trip to donwtown Valencia, where we shopped at the mall for 3 hours, then headed over to an ice skating rink! It was SO much fun!!!
Here's some random pics from the mall...
That trip was definatly one of the highlights of this semester's activities!! Ice skating was so much fun... and a lot colder than I thought! LOL
Here's some random pics from the mall...
Along the way, there were many nice things that caught my eye.
But of course, I was trying hard not to be...
One of our favorite stops was the Disney Store!
"Ducky" and his favorite cowboy shirt
Me and my Lady
After the mall, we all piled into the bus and headed over to the ice rink.
I was so excited to go ice skating for the first time ever!!
I soon caught on and was off on my own at a fast pace!!
I didn't even fall once!
That trip was definatly one of the highlights of this semester's activities!! Ice skating was so much fun... and a lot colder than I thought! LOL
My First Semester At College...
The end of fall semester was so busy and full!
(hence, the lack of posting... sorry!)
God has been so good in working my life personally, and so many people's around me. There have been wonderful chapel messages, heart-to-heart talks with friends, and great memories. Toward the end of the semester, there were plenty of fun activities!
Included were:
Thanksgiving Break Trip with Ashley
Charlie Brown Christmas Play (by LBS highschool)
Winter Orchestra Concert
Music Majors to the Wall's House (chairman of music)
Valencia Mall / Iceskating Trip
Christmas Banquet
But among many of the special activities,
we were always sure to find time to just "hang out"...
(hence, the lack of posting... sorry!)
God has been so good in working my life personally, and so many people's around me. There have been wonderful chapel messages, heart-to-heart talks with friends, and great memories. Toward the end of the semester, there were plenty of fun activities!
Included were:
Thanksgiving Break Trip with Ashley
Charlie Brown Christmas Play (by LBS highschool)
Winter Orchestra Concert
Music Majors to the Wall's House (chairman of music)
Valencia Mall / Iceskating Trip
Christmas Banquet
But among many of the special activities,
we were always sure to find time to just "hang out"...
Music Major Fellowship...
Me and Mrs.Wall at their house...
Ashley and I at the GA, waiting for coffee!
Me and my Grammar teacher, Mrs.Dunwoody
Me at the GA with the 'First Lady', Mrs.Chappell
My first semester at college was definatly full of wonderful memories that I will carry with me the rest of my life! I'll be posting about different events individually/in groups within the next few days.
Lots of pictures coming up!! Be prepared!! LOL
Lots of pictures coming up!! Be prepared!! LOL
Saturday, January 1, 2011
Putting Old Things Behind and Reaching Ahead...
January 1, 2011~
The very first time I type the new year! How exciting! A brand new year... who knows what will be in store? As I look back over this previous year, I see how many different lessons I've learned. There were times of happiness, tears, laughter, meditation, and inspiration. I've learned lessons in submission, humility, patience, trust, and most of all, faith.
I'd have to say, overall, it's been a faith-testing year.
By faith, I prayed my family to California.
By faith, I left the place I knew so well in NC.
By faith, I stepped out on my own for the first time.
By faith, I sat back and watched God work so many miracles,
saw Him prove Himself, and stood in awe as He preformed
the impossible over again.
I've grown closer to Him and He's become more real to me.
So much has happened. A year ago, I never would have thought I would be here. So what will I be doing a year away? What things will happen? Only God knows and I sure am glad He is in control!
May this year of 2011 be a full one, used for Christ, my Beloved. I'm very excited to see what this new year brings. My God be glorified in everythings. Who knows, maybe He will come back this year. May it be a year of growth for all of us; in spirit, maturity, and academically.
Well, it's time to push aside old things and
reach for all the new memories to be made.
The very first time I type the new year! How exciting! A brand new year... who knows what will be in store? As I look back over this previous year, I see how many different lessons I've learned. There were times of happiness, tears, laughter, meditation, and inspiration. I've learned lessons in submission, humility, patience, trust, and most of all, faith.
I'd have to say, overall, it's been a faith-testing year.
By faith, I prayed my family to California.
By faith, I left the place I knew so well in NC.
By faith, I stepped out on my own for the first time.
By faith, I sat back and watched God work so many miracles,
saw Him prove Himself, and stood in awe as He preformed
the impossible over again.
I've grown closer to Him and He's become more real to me.
So much has happened. A year ago, I never would have thought I would be here. So what will I be doing a year away? What things will happen? Only God knows and I sure am glad He is in control!
May this year of 2011 be a full one, used for Christ, my Beloved. I'm very excited to see what this new year brings. My God be glorified in everythings. Who knows, maybe He will come back this year. May it be a year of growth for all of us; in spirit, maturity, and academically.
Well, it's time to push aside old things and
reach for all the new memories to be made.
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